some things on my overactive mind

i think that it is a great idea to have discipleship group in bed, as sarah jayne, chelsea and i did this week (see above). nothing sweeter than a couple hours cuddling and sharing hearts in the middle of the afternoon.

for me, being playful with others is an act of vulnerability. it is easier for me to let you see me serious and smart and soulful, than playful.

i wonder about having the word joy tattooed behind my right ear. because to me that word sums up a great deal of what repentance has looked like as i cooperate with God in my personal transformation.

today, for the first time in a long time, i wanted to read poetry. i gorged myself on e. e. cummings and rainer maria rilke mostly. it was good for my soul, though i had to remain vigilant about the longings and melancholy poetry often evokes in me.

people are really generous. yesterday when i came home, i was greeted by two people who were donating things (1) 10 boxes full of brand new hats, blankets, jackets, etc. and (2) leftover goulash and a commitment to hosting one Love Feast per month!

been thinking a lot lately about the prophetic voice and its appropriate exercise. thinking about it alongside pastoral hearts. there are people i know who are more strongly prophetic and others more strongly pastoral and i think that we need both, deeply. sometimes they don't do real well at appreciating one another, however. but i think we're supposed to be each other's checks and balances and to trust that what God's putting in the hearts of his pastors is just as weighty as what he's putting in the hearts of his prophets. i saw this lived out well the other night at our tri-community prayer meeting with the bridge street house, the gold ave house, and the boiler room. ryan is prophetic, tony is pastoral, and i saw them honoring one another in their giftedness, allowing themselves to be influenced by one another. balancing.

jenn said, "brooke, you are someone who throws around the word 'thrice' without even blinking. seriously!" this using of extravagant words is what i get teased for a lot around here.

chelsea said that she sees my relationship with tony like we're sitting down in a library drinking expensive beverages and saying "shit." she said its the combination of intellectualism and crassness that we both exhibit. very funny!

the Big Lake is not enough to prevent warmth and connection from growing between two people. and now this one is one of my favorite ones, a greenhouse, and a kindred spirit.

"kingdom-building is sexy." is what it said on the t-shirt i made. it's an inside joke and we are not entirely sure how to briefly explain it, particularly to people outside our particular subculture. but trust you me, it sure cracks us up!

we moved morning prayer to 7 am for the winter months because this is what bodies do when they are in step with the seasons: they are earlier to bed and later to rise.

i deleted my facbook account this week in a moment of clarity and conviction. this small obedience of behavioral change i hope will set into motion a whole sequence of sin-revealing and freedom-bestowing work in me. the end goal: throw off what hinders and come out on the other side with MORE of Him.

there is a friend whom i really miss. but the trail between us is overgrown with so much brush and thistle that i can't see the way through at present.

i realized today that i've been practicing submission and not minding it a bit! also, i get it now. i get what it means and i see what it looks like in practice. it feels surprisingly freeing, and very loving.

the men in this house have been loving me so well and by that love i am being healed. thank you chip, danny, michael, and tony. i love yous!